My son with diagnosed with type 1 diabetes at the age of 4 years and 1 month, and because of this there are so many things I will never know.
My son played flag football at the age of 5 and hated it. I will never know if he really hated football or if he hated that his sugar ran sky high before each practice and then dropped to the inner depths of the earth following practice.
My son loves diabetes camp. I will never know if he really loves going away to camp or if he just loves being in a safe place with a hundred other people just like him, people living with Type 1 diabetes.
My son hated the first few months of 1st grade. I will never know if he just plain hated 1st grade or if a fear of his diabetes not being cared for was the reason for the revolt.
My son doesn’t like to be away from me. I will never know if he just loves me to death (who doesn’t) or if he knows I am his main caretaker and I can handle any diabetes situation that can come up.
My son gets angry at me sometimes. Even tells me that he hates me. I will never know if this is something that would have happened anyway (lucky me) or if it is because he is angry at his diabetes and he can take it out on me.
My son is a really compassionate little boy. He displays empathy for all different abilities and people. I will never know if he is just a sweetheart or if having diabetes has made his heart grow huge and understand others’ trials and tribulations.
My son is great in math. I will never know if he is great in math because he is just so smart, or if hearing numbers and weights and carb counts at every meal has opened his brain to numbers in a way that is uncommon in little children.
My son hates doing homework. I will never know if he really hates homework, or if holding it together all day: school, friends, enemies, nurse visits, and diabetes duty, is just too much for one little guy and at the end of the day he just needs a break.
And the saddest thing about all this is, my son will never know either.